The State of YOUR Unions: 2018

We just had opportunity to hear the State of the Union address given by the sitting President.  Regardless to how you feel about it, it seems that this is as good a time as any to examine ourselves.  As individuals we should take time to  ask the questions,  "What is good, what is bad and what still needs work in my life?"  It is a new year and here are a few areas I know I am examining:

SPIRITUAL

I start here because I realize that everything hinges on our spiritual walk.  Everything that I need to be successful is connected to how I entreat God and follow His word.  If we seek Him first, He promised to add all things to us.  So for the state of our union with God,  we should examine again what is good, what is not and what needs improvement.  This can be seen in our prayer life, our time with God, our study time, or whether or not we are really living by faith.  Faith is the only thing that pleases God, so living not by what we see, but what He says is key.  Loving people like He does is also key, we can't connect with Him and not connect with others... which bring us to the next area...

SOCIAL

Sometimes we think being spiritual excuses this area, but it does not.  We need to connect with people in a good way if we want to connect with God.  Forgiving, being kind, genuine concern and genuine love.  God says "How can you say you love Me, who you have not seen and do not love your brother that you always see?"  It takes more grace in this area because sometimes people don't act lovable.  (neither do we)  Instead of building walls to keep people out, find how you can connect with them in a peaceful way.  You can't let everyone in your circle, but that is not required for you to love them, believe the best and pray for them.  The same for our marriages and close relationships.  Loving each other even when it looks so familiar, finding ways to be a blessing and to minister to the needs of your spouse, children and family that may be kind of distant. If we want a successful year, we must examine the state of our social unions. 

PHYSICAL

One area that can be missed as we examine our unions, is the one with ourselves.  How are you taking care of you?  You need rest, fun, peace, food, exercise,  time away and outlets.  If you are not taking time for you this year, you will be successful in some areas, but YOU will suffer for it.  I take my vacation every quarter.  I have been teased about how timely I am at submitting my request and leaving, but I know how much I give and plan to give everyday at work, at home and to those I mentor; so if I am going to be on top of it all, I have to replenish.  The same with you, if you have a vacation you do not take, start taking it. Take time to adjust your eating habits, exercise and do things that make you feel good.  The job will be there, the responsibility will be there and the world will go on... you need to take time to relax, restore and replenish.

FINANCIAL

Budget, Budget, Budget.  It almost sounds like a bad word!  But we have to ask ourselves, "What is the state of my finances?"  This area I have been looking at near the end of 2017 and I am making adjustments to change some things this year.  I am looking at where I am going and I need to pay attention to what is ahead.  Someone once told me they count their money every morning. ( meaning they check their accounts)  I started doing that and noticed when something went out that was not supposed to, or something had NOT gone out that was.  It pays to pay attention. Checking things includes spending, saving and giving.  As believers we know that honoring God is key.  I can't tell you how many times He has brought me through financial issues in ways I could not have thought of, just because I honor Him in my giving.  Never discount God's ability to take little and make much.  He keeps his promises when it comes to your finances, because He is a God who keeps His promises and He cares about every area of your life. 

MENTAL

I left this area for last mainly because I realize,  if the other areas are good, sometimes this can be also.  It is hard to deal well with people if your mind is worried about  relationships, finances or you are having physical challenges. God promises to keep us in perfect peace if our minds were stayed on Him.  So peace is one area that deals with our state of mind; the other is being challenged to do more, learn more, take in more to make ourselves  better.  I recently spoke to a friend who is challenging me to do something that I have been avoiding for years, this is the first year that I am actually thinking about it.  It is scary, but if I allow God to work in me in this faith project,  I know He will work out the details and I will be better for it.  So along with a peaceful mind, it is also good to challenge yourself,  by trying something new or different in 2018. 

THE STATE OF YOUR UNIONS

So what is the state of your unions?  Are they strong?  Are you ready for this great year and all that it may hold?  If not, take time to talk to God about building yourself up as a total person, not just one area or the other.  We want to be WHOLE.  Bottom line you should ask yourself,  "What is good, what is bad and what just needs more work?"  Then work on it!  Surround yourself with people who mean you good, and you them.  Do what is necessary to ensure that at the end of this year, you have met some if not all of the goals you set.. successfully.  God has a plan for us, it is great.  Make sure you are doing your part to see it. 

Relationships: "Fighting Responsibly!"

Not everything that looks like a fight- is a fight.

In our subdivision we have ducks, these ducks have a designated pond with wild bushes to play, feed, and sleep in.  Somehow these ducks like to wander, they may show up in  a driveway, they may even lay eggs in the flower beds.  At first it was interesting to watch them, but now it is just normal.   On my way to work one morning as I pulled out of the driveway, I noticed about four or five ducks waddling across the street. It was unusual to see that many, so I made a mental note to pay attention once I got out of the garage in case some were on our side of the street.  This was early morning so the middle school kids were at the bus stop.  All of a sudden the kids began running towards the ducks and stomping their feet yelling "Hey.... Hey... Stop!"   I stopped my car and looked.  It didn't take me long to realize that what the children thought they saw was not what was happening.  I rolled my window down just as they reached the ducks and yelled to the kids "They are not FIGHTING!"  The kids stopped and stared at me with  confused looks on their faces.  About that time an older kid behind them with his camera phone chimed in... "They are mating!"  With that, I rolled my window up, and pulled away as the bus came around the corner... just in time.  

I admit I laughed a bit at the innocence these kids had to step in to break up a duck fight.   I headed down the street wondering how those kids were feeling as the bus passed their ducks, and as usual, I got to thinking...

Everything that looks like a fight is not a fight. 

FIGHT WITH LOVE IN MIND

We know those ducks were not fighting,  but their process sure looked like it. In our relationships we have to know how to fight responsibly.  Even if everyone looking from the outside thinks we are fighting, we have to  know that the process is much more than that. Not everything we disagree on has to end with harsh words or someone getting hurt.  In fact most of our fighting topics should not even be given the power to mess us up.  

When we fight or disagree, it should  be with love in mind- not winning, not proving someone else wrong.  We should consider the person we are engaging and realize that if we genuinely LOVE them, how we talk to them, when we talk to them, and how we handle them, should be driven by love.  Since relationship are more than romantic, if by chance you are about to engage someone you do not 'love', then back away.... go to God and approach them in HIS love.  Either way, whether you like them or not, fight with love as the center. 

EVERY FIGHT SHOULD PRODUCE

Another thing to do to fight responsibly is to know that if we are going to engage in a discussion, a disagreement or anything else, there has to be an end in mind.  Having disagreements should not be just to ruin your day or anyone else's, nor just to prove a point.  If you don't know what you want the end results to be, or what good can come of it, stay away until you have a desired end- one that is mutually beneficial and glorifies God.  I understand that you cannot control the other person's response, but you can work on yours.  Those ducks were about to engage in what looked like a fight, but the end result was going to be productive.  Your fight should result in life for your relationships, understanding, and in some cases ... even fun.

ALLOW FOR THE FUN!

Have you ever been in a verbal battle with someone and all of a sudden in the midst of trying to explain a point one of you said something that made NO sense at all?  I mean... NO SENSE, and both of you knew it immediately!  I have done that before and I looked at the person, they looked at me and we both burst out laughing!  At that point, the fight was really over. We couldn't go back to the point we were pushing to make because JOY stepped in.  We can still talk some of it out, but the pressure that was building was gone. Let it go realizing there is still joy in the midst of what is wrong.  When joy shows up, learn to capture it!  None of us are perfect, and sometimes we are trying so hard to be right that we are just wrong.  Instead of making that the new argument, take the break... laugh!

DON'T FIGHT THE FRICTION

Understand that any time we are in a relationship with people, we will have disagreements, we will have opportunities to be challenged, upset or just plain mad.  When it looks like you are fighting to others, they may discount your relationship and try to give you tips to help you stop fighting or  offer tips to ensure you win.   I encourage you to not fight the friction in relationships, in itself it is not bad, friction can help us grow.  Just like iron sharpens iron, we can be a help to each other; we can grow and learn lessons that help us deal with  life.  Who better to learn from than the ones you love?  In this life, fight responsibly knowing that if we handle our fights right, we all can benefit, and ultimately God can still get the glory. 

Cooperating With God!

It is hard to get anything done without cooperation.  We see that in our families, in our school system and in our government.  Everything that gets done, gets done by people who work together and do their part towards a common goal.  Rarely will we accomplish anything completely alone, we need each other.  We know this when it comes to our everyday lives, but what about our spiritual life?

The definition of cooperation is to 'act jointly, to work toward the same end, or to assist someone or comply with their requests.' Isn't that a simple definition?  Almost too simple. I want to give some insight on how we can be more cooperative towards what God is wanting for us in 2018.

IT STARTS WITH A PROMISE

First thing we need to pay attention to is WHO and WHAT we are cooperating with. Since the objective is not to just get what we want, we have to know and understand the overall goal.  As believers, we want what God wants and we have given up our will for His.   So we know WHO we are cooperating with. The WHAT can sometimes seem unsure, but we should realize we are not trying to get God to sign off on what we want.  The best way to determine what the WHAT is, is to look for His promises. That way we are working towards the same end result and common goal.   His word holds more than we can imagine, every thing God has provided for us is found in His word.

A promise is a declaration or assurance that one will do a particular thing, or that a particular thing will happen.  If we stopped right there, then it would seem easy!  God just has to do what He said He would do, and we can go on with life abundantly.  Somehow that has not been my reality, and I am certain it has not been yours. Every promise that God has made, He says "yes" to, but His overall goal is not just that we are healed, or prosperous, or even at peace.  His ultimate will is that we KNOW HIM, and go back with Him when He comes. That we operate by His love towards each other.  So sometimes those promises are delayed as we grow in faith and in love. The good thing is that as we cooperate with His will, He works things out for us according to it. 

COOPERATION 

God has promised to finish the work He has begun in us.  The salvation that He is working in us, the peace that He promises and the purpose that He ordained.  Some of us are struggling in the process, but we only need to cooperate with the work He is doing in us.  Once we have received Christ, this promise goes into effect.  Only problem is that we are made with a free will.  So though the promises of God are in Him- Yes and Amen... we can prolong or stop the manifestation. God is going to do His part, we need to do ours.   Here are a few promises that we need to cooperate with.  I am sure you have others that you can add to see how you are cooperating with God.

Salvation:  This work was finished on Calvary.  The way we cooperate with God is by growing in grace.  Reading the word of God, treating people right, sharing our faith and trusting Him as we live this out.  We can't make ourselves any more saved than the work God has done, seeing it in our everyday life is how we cooperate with Him. Allowing Him to lead us everyday... 

Healing:  We often think that if God has healed us, it is so and that is it.  But cooperating with God may look like doing the things naturally that bring health to a body God has already healed.  It looks like resting when you need to, perhaps even taking medication when you need to.  Just because you take your meds, does not mean you are not trusting God any more than staying on a job would say you were not trusting Him to provide.  We do what we can and faith allows us to trust Him to do what we can't.  

Peace:  We know the word of God promises us peace if we keep our mind on Him.  Somehow it does not always seem to come easily.  But the word of God is true, keeping our mind on Him is not just in  a moment.  It is knowing that everyday I am fully aware of His presence and His provision.  So I am not devastated by unexpected things that show up from day to day.   I hold onto the ONE who is ever present.  This helps me maintain peace, even in  storm. 

WHAT ARE YOU DOING ABOUT IT?

If we want to see success in any area in our life, we will need to consider the promises from the word of God,  We need to consider HIM and the part He has already done and continues to do.  Then consider what we are willing to do to see it come to pass.   I often would remind God that He promised to complete a work in me, and He lets me know "Yes, I did... and what are you going to do to cooperate with that work?"  That is my challenge today and every day.  So today I invite you to challenge yourself to not just know the promises of God, and quote or memorize them,but also cooperate with the Promises of God. 

"Changing Your Dreams- or Nightmares!"

Everybody dreams.  Whether we realize it or not, we dream often.  We dream of being better than we are, smaller than we are, larger than we are, more popular than we are, more anointed than we are and definitely more wealthier than we are.  There is nothing wrong with dreaming as long as we don't get into unhealthy comparisons or allow a dream to drive us away from our purpose.  

THE AMERICAN DREAM

One of the most common types of dreams are the unrealistic ones.  These are the dreams that we have because everyone else has it.  There is nothing wrong with the dream itself, it is normally a great goal that is supposed to lead us to happiness and peace.  But the problem with this dream is that we often forget to measure it by what God is saying for us as individuals, not by what everyone else deems as the "American Dream."  One example is home ownership.  I have heard about very successful people who choose not to own a home, not because they can't afford it, but because they have found a lifestyle that works for them, and because they manage their finances, in such a way that they don't need the write off.  I am not saying don't plan to buy a house, I'm just saying you are not a failure if you choose not to.  Making decisions as God leads us helps us to not waste time or money on things that He plans to move us from in the future.  Only He knows what the future holds.   Any dream should be given to God to determine if it is right for you; that includes decisions about marriage, singleness, job opportunities, college , or  even investments in people or products.  God does care about our lives, and He promised to give us guidance when we seek Him. 

NIGHTMARES 

In my younger days, I really liked scary movies.  I liked the intrigue of not knowing what was behind the door, or what was lurking in the dark.  After getting saved that changed a bit.  I still like thrillers but don't like things that are evil. I don't like seeing people kill with pleasure from evil intent or demonic driven fear.  I have never watched the Nightmare on Elm Street movies. It was about someone in your dreams coming to life! I was curious about them, but opted out because to me dreams ARE real.  I couldn't afford to get those thoughts and images in my dreams.  I am not a typical spiritual dreamer, but God has shown me things before in dreams so I guard what I allow in my mind.  

Like I said, we all dream, but some of us have been having nightmares.  Those nightmares trick us into believing there really is something in the dark to stop us, and there really is something lurking under every bed, behind every door, in the midst of every innocent moment.  The nightmare comes to awaken you from the good  dreams, to throw you and stop your progress...but remember they are not real.  

CHANGING THE NIGHTMARE

As a kid I had numerous reoccurring dreams.  One in particular was a nightmare of a faceless man coming after me in a house. Every corner I turned  he showed up, every door I opened, he was there.  Can  you imagine what this nightmare could have done to me when I worked in prison ministry?  It could have halted any progress in writing to my 40+ pen pals due to fear.  

I continued to have this dream until I started taking charge of my nightmares.  One night I found myself in the midst of the worst part of the nightmare, and just when I was about to be grabbed... I woke up, looked around realizing where I was, said a quick prayer and went back to sleep.  Then I CHANGED THE DREAM! (seriously)  I picked up at the scariest part and made a door for me to escape, other times I would all of a sudden gain my wings and fly out of a convenient window that appeared out of no where.  Then I would wake up, and consider the dream finished- on my terms.   Selah.  I don't know why this worked.  I know this sounds odd, I have even told it to counselors and they look at me as if it is impossible, one told me I must be very controlling...  I didn't really care what anyone thought about how I handled my nightmare, I was the one suffering and losing sleep behind them.  I may seem controlling, but it was better than having a nightmare control me.  I refused to allow MY dreams to torment me with fear.  I don't know what you are dreaming about or what faceless obstacle the enemy has placed in your path, but I encourage you to take charge of your own dreams.  Don't wait for a knight in shiny armor to show up unexpectedly in a dream you can change yourself.  Give God your dreams and allow Him to govern the way of escape He has for you in every area. 

I HAVE A DREAM

I have a dream, it may not be the American Dream, but I really want to give God glory. I want Him to one day say "Well Done".  I live today, not to gain more things, but to gain more of Him; to walk in His word, bless people and in the midst of all of that, I know He will bless me.  Yes, I have a home, but I may sell it.  I am currently single, but I may marry.  I am working a job I love, but God is in control.  I am open to the Giver of Dreams.  I give my dreams to Him because ultimately He is my dream.

2018 Exchange the Familiar for The Unknown!

I have been on an interesting journey with God when it comes to this new year.  Some years ago, I made a request to Him about my life and kind of told Him what I wanted.  (I assumed He wanted the same)  In a nutshell it dealt with relationships and going forward after a divorce.   In the mist of talking to Him about possibly remarrying and if that was something I wanted to do, I thought I'd yielded my ways to His.  See, I was good.  I felt  that I no longer wanted to work that hard on a relationship, so being single, working my purpose and taking care of my kids was enough.  It sounded sooo spiritual, until someone fronted me on that, so I changed my mind and figured I would open myself up to God and His will.  (especially if it looked a bit like mine.)

STARTING FROM SCRATCH

In  my prayer time, I told God,

"Lord, I am open to YOU and what You have for me, 

but I don't want to start from scratch."   

NOTE:  This was what I TOLD GOD, not what HE TOLD ME.

I knew exactly what I was saying and it changed how I have responded since.  See,  I didn't want to be in a relationship with someone I knew nothing about.  I didn't want to guess whether they were a man or woman, or if they have done jail time, or if they were hiding from the FBI.  Basically, I wanted to have some clue about them and where they came from before possibly entering a relationship.  It sounded good and fair, so I said "Amen" and went on with life.   

PLAYING GAMES

I play this game on my tablet when I am bored or waiting in an airport or something.  I have figured out this game pretty good.  If I make a mistake it is because I am not paying attention, not because the game is that challenging.  See the game has different settings, one is very familiar, the obstacles move at the same pace every time, so after awhile you can know when to jump or move and gain more points.  But sometimes you can still mess up and miss out and have to start again.  Other levels are random, they are not familiar and the territory changes often!  This level requires that you pay attention, stay in the game and jump when you used to just wait and watch for added benefits or adversities.  One level of the game is very familiar and kind of boring, the other is exciting, challenging and it makes me think.  Life it much like that game...

THE FAMILIAR

After my prayer and time with God, telling Him I didn't want to start from scratch.... here I am, years later and I have been around the familiar quite a bit. I am almost tired of the familiar!  Don't get me wrong, the familiar is not all bad, but it requires a lot less faith. There are no surprises with the familiar, the familiar makes you feel like you have more control because you understand it or you know how to maneuver around the obstacles. That is what happens when things are familiar.  The familiar also limits your growth, because the boundaries are the same, no challenge.  You are not required to go outside what you have ever done before- all you do is stay within what you know as ...familiar.  I was talking to a friend the other day and I mentioned this to them.  I told them, God will let you have what you say.  We forget that sometimes!  I asked for familiar and got it.  The bible says "according to your faith, be it unto you." I got what I believed for,  but I wonder what would happen if I actually opened myself up to something new God has for my life, The unfamiliar? What would happen if you did?

THE UNKNOWN

We should never forget the mighty God we serve.  He is always teaching, always instructing and always there.  If we ever get to the place we forget this... we might miss something.  Here is what I got from this:

In 2018 open yourself up to the unknown. Don't lock yourself in to what you already did in 2017, 2016... even if it was successful.  Open yourself up to what God knows, but you  may not.  We don't go from glory to glory by just living where we are, on the same level in life.  Life is like that game, some of the best moves and joys will come in unfamiliar territory. It will require that you pay attention, pray and expect to adjust your game. 

I know it can be kind of scary, because FEAR creeps in and makes us think there is imminent danger on the unknown path. FEAR makes us back up and avoid anything that we don't quite understand, but what is FAITH?  It is substance of things that are hoped for, evidence of things we can't see.... the  UNKNOWN!  

As people of faith, let's position ourselves this year to venture into areas that only God has the map to.  There may be things that you have TOLD God, that you may need to retract.  It could be that He is waiting for you to operate by His words, not your own.  The longer it takes us to realize we are operating on our own words, the longer it takes for us to take off on this great journey.  As you go into this year, be open to the steps and opportunities that God gives you that may not look familiar.  He will give you the ride of our life and  each step will be an adventure of faith, growth and purpose!   

Welcome to 2018, expect great... LEVEL UP!