Permanent Decisions/Temporary Situations

The news yesterday included this breaking story; 'A man shoots and killed his neighbor'.  We are often hit with news like this and it is often not clear why.  In this instance, some said it had to do with her dogs, others say she helped his estranged wife.  The news only tells us what they hear, But I often wonder what goes on in the mind of a person who makes such a quick yet lasting decision. I thought and prayed for both families this morning, the spouses, children, family and friends on both sides. 

Decisions can be deceptive.  They can tell you in a moment- 'this is what I want'. But in the moments afterwards, we realize it is the furthest from what we wanted.  If we could take the time to really think before we make these decisions, we would realize it may not be giving us what we ultimately want.  A person who is fighting over custody of children and decides to harm the other person,  where will you be and where will the children be?  Who has custody now? 

 

 

 

I once intervened for a woman who was very distraught about having lost custody of her daughter.  She was so upset that when they came to get me, she was threatening suicide.  Everyone who heard her was upset and ran for help.  When I entered the room, I sent everyone out because I knew that they would not understand my next actions.   I told her to stop crying and look at me.  I asked her what it was that was hurting her so.  She told me her daughter was taken from her, not because of anything she did, but she was kind of tricked into giving her away.  I asked her what she wanted most, and her answer was for her daughter to be with her.  My next question is what we should all ask ourselves before making a permanent decision: 

"Is what you are deciding going to help or hurt you in reaching your ultimate goal?"  

Her tears stopped and when she looked up at me, I continued,  

 

"If you kill yourself, the battle is decided.  You will NEVER get custody, you will NEVER see her again and whoever has her, keeps her."   But then we went a little further... "Or, you do not kill yourself but everyone heard you say you would.  If you get a chance to get her back and you need character witness or people who can testify on your behalf... all these women outside who are hurting for you cannot testify that you appear sound in judgment.  You have made a decision that can follow you, simply by threatening suicide."   (disclaimer:  I had prior knowledge that she was not really suicidal, but was just in an emotional moment that went too far)

 

After urging her to do what is necessary to get her life together. We went on to talk about the things she needs to do to get what she ultimately wants.   I will say today, years after that, this same woman is enjoying her family, much better and helping others.  DECISIONS, DECISIONS.

   Don't make permanent decisions in temporary situations.

DAVID

2 Samuel 11

All decisions we make have some type of affect.  If you recall in the bible David on one hand made a momentary decision to sleep with Bathsheba and it had lasting effects on his reign as king.  He tried to cover up his wrong after she got pregnant by trying to get her husband, Uriah, to sleep with his wife so they could pretend the child was his.  It didn't' work, Uriah was at war and more connected to those in the battle, didn't feel it was right to enjoy his wife while their lives were on the line.  After many tries, David simply had him placed at the frontline and killed.  As a result the child was lost,  and his kingdom was compromised. Decisions, Decisions.

 

 

 

1 Samuel 25

Another time David was about to attack Nabal (His name means Fool) because he was rude and extremely disrespectful when his men inquired about supplies.   But Nabal's wife, Abigail stepped in.   When she heard David was going to attach him, she sent them food and provisions and reminded David that he was God's chosen man to rule and he should not get unnecessary blood on his hand.  She wisely reminded him that he couldn't afford to act like God could not deal with his enemies.  He had a future.

 

 

The lesson in this:  Don't allow a 'Fool' to make you decide something you have to live with.

 

 

TIPS TO AVOID BAD PERMANENT DECISIONS

 

This world is temporary.  Every decision we make that deals directly with this world is temporary but we have to live through the consequences of making them.  The most permanent decision we will ever make deals with eternity.  Here are a few tips for both: 

 

 

THIS WORLD

• Surround yourself with good people who will give you sound counsel.  There is safety there.
• Understand your purpose!  If you know where you are going, you can know which roads don't lead there.
• Remember your dreams, the things that mean a lot to you, the people that mean a lot to you.  When you make decisions, also think about how they affect them.
• Pray!  God gives us direction and if we "Be Still" we can make better decisions.
• Try to avoid circumstances early.  The bible says to agree with your adversary.  Learn to make peace with people that you have to deal with.  If you have a peaceful demeanor, you may be less likely to provoke a fight.
• Take your time.  If you don't feel good about something.  Move away for a time to think and to ask questions.  Decisions made in a hurry bring anxiety.

 

NEXT WORLD

• Knowing Jesus and accepting Him is the BEST decision we will ever make.  From there every good and perfect thing flows.   Does not mean your life will be perfect, but God will give you grace and favor in all things.
• Don't allow others to turn you from God- if you have been hurt by a church, find another one and be still.  Get past that, it is temporary.  They will be judged for what they have done, but so will you. 

Giving ourselves to God daily helps us know how to deal with this world and be prepared for the next.  Choose His ways!

 

 

 

 

Heros!

I watched a heroic act today.  Okay, I wasn't there, but I watched it on the news. A man assisted two people off a Metro Bus filled with water after flooding.  At first when I heard the news announcer call him a hero, I paused and thought..."Why is EVERYONE a hero just because they do something right?"   That was honestly my first thought.  I continued to listen and heard the accounts of the man inside the bus who talked about his fear and not knowing what to do.  In his mind,  he didn't know what was going to happen.  He was scared to stay on the bus, scared to get off.  As a spectator from the comforts of my home, I thought once he started walking outside the bus with water only to his waist, he would feel better.  But he said he was concerned about man holes and pot holes (which Houston has many of).  I never thought about how fear follows you as you escape.  The danger in his mind was not over until he was far away from it in a place of safety where he could see the bus from a distance. In his mind, the man who helped him ..was a hero. 

I found the man who rescued them, was not even a passenger on the bus.  His car was also in the water, but he had already escaped it.  He went BACK into the water to help someone he didn't even know.

The word HERO can be used and misused so much today.  On one hand we have people who go out of their way, leave their own comfort zones or places of safety to reach and help someone who is in danger.  On another hand we have people who do what almost anyone would do, by calling 911 or making some effort to bring help they cannot give to someone that needs it. Sometimes both get the title of hero.

BUT WHAT IS A HERO?

A HERO is defined as a person noted for courageous acts or nobility of character,  a person who, in the opinion of others, has special achievements, abilities, or personal qualities and is regarded as a role model or ideal.

 

 

In light of this definition, every day we run into heroes. We are never a hero in our own mind, that is a title given by someone who views you as something you may not feel you are.

 

HERO 1992

 

 

One of my favorite movies was the movie oddly entitled "Hero"  Dustin Hoffman starred in this film about a man who was on the streets and witnessed a plane crash.  He  reluctantly took his shoes off, (since he didn't want them dirty) went to the plane, and forced the stuck door to open as the plane  burst into flames.  Everyone who could escape on their own ran from the plane to safety.  But when he realized a few people were still on the plane, he grudgingly went back and rescued them, one of which was a reporter played by Gena Davis.

If you can get past the language, the message was really humbling.  The theme was about a man who didn't have a perfect life but he did what was right, without wanting the accolades that came with it.  The reporter who was thankful to be alive was insistent on finding and rewarding the man who ran into a burning plane to save strangers.  No matter what others thought or happy they were,  in his mind, he was NOT a hero.  But based on the definition of it, Heroes are seen in the eyes of others.

 

BE A HERO THIS YEAR!

Most of what I write in my blogs have a spiritual context, simply because that is part of who I am, so this conversation is not just about floods or fires or tornados.  It is about life.  

 

People every day are in situations that they- like the bus rider... don't know how they are going to get out of it. They don't have any clue what the road holds or if their steps are going to be good or bad, safe or detrimental.  We as Christians have the power and opportunity to reach, touch and even rescue people from the pains they are in.  We have an answer in God that speaks to every trouble that man can find themselves in.  And not just in this world, but in the world to come.  But people sometimes need a hero.  Someone who is not concerned about accolades or credit, they are not concerned about their own safety or what others think about them, (good or bad), they just know someone needs help. 

 

 

OUR RESPONSIBILITY

When you think about responsibility, remember these two words: 

 

RESPONSE   ~     ABILITY

We are only responsible for what we  have the ability to respond to.  If you are drowning, it is not my responsibility to jump in and save you.  I can't swim.  But if I have a phone on me, or see someone nearby... I have the RESPONSE ABILITY to call someone to assist you.  If I see a life jacket or long rope, I have the ability to throw them to you.  This year, when you see someone hurting, think about what you can do to help.  What do you have in your hands?  Can you reach them, connect them to someone else, can you pray?  Whatever your ability, make plans to respond. We don't do what we do to get accolades or a title, we do it because it is right.  

 

"A HERO is defined as a person noted for courageous acts or nobility of character,  a person who, in the opinion of others, has special achievements, abilities, or personal qualities and is regarded as a role model or ideal." 

In your mind, this may not define you, but it is not for you to decide if the actions you take to help others is worth the title of hero. To some who may be in the midst of great pain and unsure of their focus in life, it may be life or death to them.  You may have already escaped some pitfalls in life and are well on your way to a safe zone, but when you see someone who is struggling with what you came out of, remember you have the ABILITY  to speak reach them.  The ABILITY to encourage them.  IT just takes your RESPONSE.  

I may not think every action merits the title 'Hero', but that is not my place to decide.  Someone who is hurting may see what you do to help hem as heroic.   Ultimately God knows how your testimony and service impacts the lives of others.  But if you don't want to ask Him,  I guess we can ask the man on the bus. 

To The Obamas: Thank you!

I have talked about my type of patriotism before.

Raised in a military family, I have learned to appreciate military families and the sacrifices they make daily to gain our freedom. 

My mother was a deputy sheriff in El Paso County.  She served well and made many friends of ex-offenders as she attempted to assist them in life.  My heart hurts to hear the divide with the community and police. I know they are not perfect, but much like our military, every day they risk their lives for ours.  I said all this to say, I respect the role of our military, and our police officers; my upbringing has taught me to.

I was also taught to respect our President.  It does not matter what race or party affiliation. My parents may have criticized things that were happening, but they always referred to the president as 'Mr. President' and would not tolerate any other title.  They did this for every sitting president, including the last one they lived to see.

I was also born an African American.

When the first black man ran for president, I didn't jump on board just because he was black, I still listened to what he had to say, listened to his opponents and chose accordingly.  When he was elected in 2008, I like others sat with tears in my eyes, realizing how historic this moment was.  Realizing how far we had come...

PRAYER FOR PRESIDENTS

As with all presidents prior, whether I voted for them or not,  I prayed for them.  I prayed for wisdom and insight. I prayed for protection and grace.  I prayed that they would be surrounded by good people who would guide them well.  That they would uphold the biblical values that this country was founded on and be a president that got results.  I prayed for their families and for our country, that we would benefit from their time in office and that they would hear God in how they ruled.

 

FROM THE FIRST FIST BUMP

Do you remember the 'fist bump' after the win?  There was so much talk about what it meant.  After that day, I realized that my normal prayer was not going to be enough.   I didn't realize how difficult it was going to be for this president after being elected.  I didn't realize that not only would he have to fight the normal issues of a president, but he would also have to fight for his right to be the one who was already elected.  He would have to fight for himself and his family, and he would be almost fighting for us as African Americans. 

I didn't realize we would have to defend him to uphold our own reputations.  I didn't think he would be talked about so badly, didn't fathom the racist comments that would come or know that some sworn to serve would refuse to work or even hear things he wanted to propose.  I couldn't have imagined that his wife would be ridiculed and his children criticized for dressing like kids, or that what we thought in 2008 was a breakthrough in race relations, opened an old sore in some.  With all the good we got to see, we also got to see the ugly. 

A DIFFERENT KIND OF PRAYER

I  felt that with the first black president, some of our reputation as African Americans, was riding on him and his family.  So although I make it my custom to pray for all presidents, I really prayed for this one. Not just for his politics, but for him personally,  and his family.

This was a very public office and how he handled it would speak to all of America and the world.  I felt a bit vested in his success, not as a politician, but as a black man.  So yes, I prayed for the Obamas in a way I had never prayed for a president before.

I almost felt embarrassed that this was the type of prayer I was praying for a man I had no reason to think was at risk of hurting us.  I never prayed anything like that for any other president.  But with this one, my reputation... OUR reputation was riding on him.

I prayed that:

•  He would be safe- no one would try or succeed in harming him
• That he would have wisdom and insight to deal well with the people- all people
• That his family would be a great example to everyone who observed them
• I prayed  his kids would be seen in a good light, well behaved and happy 
• I prayed he would be scandal free
• I prayed that we would be very proud after he finished his term -whether it was one or two

After awhile, I realized that he was going to hold his own,  and though I continued to pray for him,  I was less concerned about whether or not we could trust him and his family with our reputation.  Though his success and popularity bothered some, that was not my concern anymore.  As the years went by, I watched without concern of embarrassment, as our President handled his business,  gave us encouragement and laughter as he did his job as Commander in Chief. He survived 8 years of criticism and skepticism.  He still holds his head up, his family is blessed and no matter what you think about the state of the union, his union is too.

I thank President Obama and his family for showing us a scandal free, family supporting, easy going fun and purposeful family. I appreciate the efforts to finally get health care to all Americans, after years of talk, at least he did something.  As with other things in his reign, it may not be perfect, but he handled it.   It does not matter what you think of his politics, I didn't agree with everything either, but the First Family has been a breath of fresh air in a world where we were choking to find someone to look up to.  Only someone who has a deep seeded evil streak can really criticize them as people.  They have been a great example to have stand before us in the highest office in the world.  My prayers have been answered and I am thanking God for their service.   We are girding up for a new president in a week or so, I am once again preparing my prayer list.  In the mean time.....

 THANK YOU

 PRESIDENT OBAMA, FIRST LADY MICHELLE,

MALIA AND SASHA!

Reaching the World: CONTROVERSY

The bible says "He that wins souls is wise."  This task is getting harder every year.

I don't often comment about political issues, or jump in on controversy unless I almost have to.  I realize that my thoughts are different as a Christian, and my thoughts are different as a person.  I just don't always see stuff the same.  It does not mean I see it right, just not the same.

First let's talk about the issue with Kim Burrell.  First I will say, I am not a follower, so what I say is not in defense of my 'favorite' artist.  (no shade there Ms. Burrell , I also have never seen Purple Rain, don't know the words  and didn't know what songs George Michael or.. Michael George sang.)

There was a time that we could preach a message like she did and no one would record it and stream it to millions who would be offended.    Now, if you voice your opinion, whether it is spiritual or natural, you run the risk of losing endorsements, losing friends, losing respect and threats of losing your life.

Of course, if we pay real good attention, it only works that way if you go AGAINST mainstream secular America and all that we have recently allowed to be viewed as acceptable.  This generation has been raised believing some things are just intolerance and hate filled.  They don't know the standards of the bible, because we stopped preaching and teaching them. As a result, even the church is at odds as to what the standards of the bible are according to scripture.

If you think I have missed this... let me give you a REALLY controversial example.

MESSAGE: To the Church

Some of you may be supporters of President Obama's administration, and others not.  That does not matter to me.  But a few years ago, same sex marriages were approved in our country.  There was not a huge outpouring of anger or push back because MAINSTREAM America was happy.  The church however, was eerily silent- anyone who supported the administration clammed up.  Maybe not wanting to push back on the first black president that many loved.  Our protests were in personal conversations and pleas to pray for our country.  But we didn't really do anything about it, some fussed, but others took that as a push against the president. Now we are battling  bathroom access...

Now, Kim Burrell stands for what she believes (cries loud and spares not)  and some of the church, wants to support her while the world is jumping on her about the message.  Others in the SAME church want to say she is wrong and her words were not according to the gospel of love. (Which actually means God's gospel since He is love.)

What changed? Why don't we say what we believe ALL THE TIME?  It is easy when someone else takes the heat, loses opportunity and has to have their face on social media with all the comments that do not support their stance.  The real problem,  is not homosexuality, it is not intolerance, it is not hatred, anger or the lack of love.  We have simply moved a standard that we didn't set.

Our problem is and has always been a righteous God expecting us to lay aside sin, all sin...  Anything HE calls sin. 

But sin is not popular to preach about anymore because many of us are in it... at least a bit.  We moved away when we started caring what people thought about us.  As a result we... the Church of Jesus Christ, has lost ground.  We don't have a voice to 'cry loud' anymore.  When we do, even those who support us and know our hearts are in the right place, will run.  But really in God, we NEVER lose ground!  This is making us get back to preaching that does not cause fear or condemnation.  Even if you got saved with that message, it was never God's. There is no going back, we will no longer have the days of preaching hell's fire,  now we have to find a new way to reach the lost.  We will have to get back to God's way of drawing people. 

EVANGELISM IN 2017

In God's eyes, we understand there are no big sins or little sins.  Lying is just as much an issue as killing or a rant on social media,  a thought or an internet search. We know that sin is all around us so singling out just one or two is no longer acceptable, especially to those participating in the top three. 

The world does not care what we call sin.  They are stating their own way be reached, they want tolerance and love.  Funny, that is what God told us to do anyway, to love people.  Love should always be our banner, no matter what the sin. Tolerance, however, is harder to do, it makes us feel like we are compromising a standard that we didn't set.

Of course, we understand that love alone will not save.  God still requires us to confess sin and accept the sacrifice He made for it.  Which means we have to admit we have sinned.  As Christians, we have been given new life, how we present that message  will require WISDOM.  Take time when you reach out to others to pray and ask God for wisdom.  What works for one may not for the other.  What you can say or preach to one may not work for the other.  Only God knows what seed will take root.  Pray and ask God for wisdom to reach the lost, who do not know they need Him.

MESSAGE: To the World

We have a gospel that we didn't write that we have given our lives to.

Unlike some religions, it does not require us to kill you if we disagree. 

Unlike other religions, we are not required to avoid our loved ones and commit fully to the religion without regards to others on the 'outside'. 

We are required to love you, but still speak the truth in love.
We are required to reach out to you and point you to  the One who made you. 

We will try to be wise in how we proclaim our beliefs, but we won't apologize for having them.

Even if you do not like what we say, please  don't think it means we don't love you, we do.  We are not perfect, we make a lot of mistakes and even sin on occasion.  But even if we sin we are still  subject to admitting it, repenting  and going back to God.  The same process we would tell you about.

If you don't believe what we do, that is really okay.  God has a lot of ways to reach you and we have to trust that as we pray for you, He will help you see Him.  But the beauty of it all is this, you don't have to.  God honors the freewill He gave you to choose Him or not. 

We are not a threat to you.   If you want to marry who you want, you can according to the laws of the land.  If you want to drink or smoke, you can. (some of us do too)  The laws of the land allows you to do that.  If you want to divorce, remarry, live together and sleep with whoever you want, you can.  The laws of the land allow you to do that. 

Just  remember, as Christians we live in this world and can be moved by the laws of this land, but we are no longer of this world and have to respond and live by the laws of God.  That is our religion as you call it, our conviction, our belief.  We have chosen by our own free will to serve Jesus Christ, today.  We choose to follow Him and obey His laws, even if it is not the same as the land we are currently in.  If you feel sorry for us and think that by chance we are wrong about this whole 'Religion" thing, at least you have had the benefit of us loving you, trying to be our best, praying for you and believing the best of you... Hopefully we can point you to Jesus as your Lord as well.  If not, we will continue to serve Him....

UNASHAMED