Lord, Have Mercilus!

At first glance, you only see what everyone else sees.  A young black man, mid-twenties with a strong build and a striking smile.  If you didn’t know any better, you would admire him, and keep going.  If perhaps you would have the opportunity to get more information about him, you would find that he is an outside linebacker for the Houston Texans. 

This new information would leave you with, numbers, stats and dates.  If you stopped right there, you would be impressed, but you would still be missing the heart of the man.

Whitney Mercilus, is not just a great ball player with striking good looks, he is what some may call a ‘glacier’- meaning that the strength of who he is, is far below the surface.  If you miss this part, you have missed him all together.

Originating from Haiti, Mercilus says his greatest inspiration in life comes from his parents.  Being raised in a Christian household, he does not apologize for his faith, his heritage or his culture.  In fact, all three have made him who he is today.   When asked about his parents and childhood, he speaks highly of how they raised him to work hard and never give up.  He talks about his mother’s prayers for him and how much he values his upbringing. These life lessons of not giving up, have proven to be helpful in his current career. 

THE CROSSES

During his rookie year in 2012, Mercilus started doing something that he still does today.  He began putting his ‘eye blacks’ on in the shape of a cross.  Since most of us watch from a great distance, we may not know this outward sign of an inward conviction.  It is something to remind him every time he puts on his uniform that God is with him.  We know there is nothing magical about doing this, it does not make you win as a team or avoid injuries. It does not guarantee your future, but God loves when we remember Him.   He tells us to acknowledge Him in all of our ways and He will direct our paths.  This outward sign says in a sense, “Lord, I trust You, and regardless of the outcome, I am still in Your hands.”

A NATIONAL STAGE

The NFL brings a national stage that has had so many poor examples, even if you don’t agree with his faith, you gotta respect it.  Mercilus says his faith is stronger now than it was when he started in the NFL.  Each of us are given a stage every day.  How we function on this stage speaks to the core of who we are; it speaks loudly to our faith and upbringing.  In a world that can afford you instant access to women, drugs and alcohol, it can be a challenge to keep your faith.  It is much easier to go along with whatever  the recognition and fame brings.  But, a strong foundation, laid by his parents, and his heart to follow God every day, is a base that keeps him grounded. (Much like the quarterbacks he sacks)

FAITH EVERY DAY

After getting baptized last year, Mercilus said his faith has grown and is helping him to deal with the realities of life.  For him, a tough camp, injuries, when the season may not be the best, and all the things that can be discouraging on this national stage and in his personal life.   His faith keeps him hoping for better on every hand, keeps him working hard to achieve better, and also keeps him out of a lot of trouble!  When it comes to his fans and strangers that he may meet in passing, he says that life is way too short to assume bad about others and miss connecting with them. That would explain his easy going nature when he meets people.  I have seen him in action and he looks like a natural!   He has a genuine heart as he reaches out to people. Along with the charities that he supports that serve children diagnosed with cancer, he is also working on his own foundation to serve underprivileged kids raised with disabilities. He also has a heart to reach his home in Haiti.

FINAL DOWN

There are a lot of athletes that get  so much attention from day to day, some good and some not so good.  But for me- I want to hear the encouraging stories that lets us, especially as believers- know that God has His kids in every arena, working behind the scenes to do their best and give Him glory at the same time.  It might not be that you will go to work with black eyes, but what is your outward sign of an inward conviction?  What can people look at to know that behind all your success, or challenges, there is still someone who relies on God on every hand through the good and the bad.   It is one thing to do your job on the court or field, it is another thing to hold to your convictions, love your parents and treat people right.  This is what I found in the man Whitney Mercilus.  If by chance you ever happen to see a young black man, mid-twenties with a strong build, a striking smile and dark crosses under his eyes, it just might be Whitney Mercilus.  It is just an outward sign that...

The Lord Has Mercilus!

SIDE LINE:  ARE YOU PRAYING YOUR TEAM WINS?

For all of you out there who constantly pray that your team wins, understand this.  On every team there are Christian Athletes and fans that do that same.  So if God answers for one team, which of His children will He disappoint?  God does not roll like that!  The bible said “Faith without Works is Dead”.  Meaning you can pray all you want, the inside work and practice is what will bring about the difference.  Good to have guys on the team who understand FAITH and WORKS!  Go Texans!

Forgive and Forget It...(Not Happening!)

We have often been told that to effectively forgive in a way that pleases God, we have to also forget the infraction.  That sounds really spiritual, but it is Not Happening!  Jesus has the ability and capacity to forgive and forget.  That was never really given to us as a requirement.

I recall a woman who was molested for much of her childhood.  After going through that and two pregnancies from her father that ended with either miscarriages or the baby dying after a few days, she found herself living a life of promiscuity.   This lasted for quite a while.  She was in and out of two marriages until the day she met Jesus in an intimate church service.  After learning about God’s love for her and His plans for her life, she realized her past was the fault of not just the enemy, but a father who was being used by that same enemy.   Her pain was not her fault. This put her on a liberating path to love God, forgive others and serve in her local church.  

In her attempt to live for God and please Him, she found herself listening to people she respected, that told her she should forgive and forget about her past. She found that to be much easier said than done. In trying to honor this new LAW, this now older adult, married with children, decided to take drastic measures to prove her love for God, and her ability to forgive.  So she moved her aging father in her home to assist him.

Many of you are appalled by her actions; many of you are applauding her actions. 

Which is right?

Forgiveness is not evident by outward actions.  Just because I invite you in my home, does not mean I have forgiven you.  Just because I embrace you at a family gathering, does not mean we are good. In fact, I can do all of these things and still have a place in my heart that hates you.  If I have not really forgiven you, any incident, reminder or even a flashback- can pull those vile emotions to the forefront, and there we go.

It is wrong to jump into someone’s life and tell them how they have not forgiven or what steps they have to do to prove they have.  The woman we just spoke of had settled in her mind that she was forgiving her father, she was working inwardly to do that until someone suggested she had to prove it.  The next few years were filled with turmoil in her home; fights between her and her husband, suspicions with her father and her young daughters, drama on every hand.  She had moments of depression that she had not felt in such a long time, things she thought were buried in forgiveness and gone, resurfaced.  What was hoped to be a happy family living in forgiveness, turned into a second hell she had to live through... again.

WHAT FORGIVING LOOKS LIKE

Matthew 6:15

But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.

Years ago, this scripture totally changed how I saw things and people who have done me wrongfully.

When I read this, it changed my life. Since that day, I realized that I did not want to give people power over how a part of my relationship with God went.  I could decide to not forgive people and possibly leave myself open to being left the same way by God. UNFORGIVEN.   

That turned my heart and head towards God!   I made up in my mind that forgiveness was going to be part of my life.   I thought of the absolute WORST thing someone could do to me,  that would make it difficult to forgive, and then began conditioning my mind to be able to forgive someone if they did that.  Since then, no one has done THAT thing, so everything else is easier. 

This worked for me when it came to some of the unnecessary, hurtful things that have been done to me in my 50+ years.  But today, I can honestly say, there is not anyone I don’t want to see in Heaven!  There is no one that I am holding a grudge against and feel God needs to ‘get them’.  I am free, because I release others.  Have I forgotten what has been done?  NO, but it does not affect me in a way that calls for restitution or revenge.

 

 

HOW DO I KNOW?
 

You know you have forgiven someone when you no longer have the urge for recompense that normally accompanies your thoughts about the incident.  You may recall the hurt and pain for a moment, but something else kicks in that makes it easier to bear.  Forgiveness does not take all pain away, but it effectively soothes what was there and turns it into something else.

Forgiveness is an inward resolve, not necessarily an outward action.  It does not mean that you don’t hold someone responsible for their act, just that you no longer are pressing for God to get them for their actions.  You have almost acknowledged the frailty of all humanity, and know that in God’s hand, we can all be better.  We have that choice, and we are choosing to allow someone to be placed in God’s hands for the better.

 

 

BENEFITS OF NOT FORGETTING
 

We know that forgiving is not always forgetting.  In fact I would dare to say… it is NEVER forgetting.  You should not spend your time trying to forget.  The main benefit of not forgetting the wrongs done to you, is that in your freedom from it, there is a platform built for you to assist others.  

The more you release things, the easier it is to talk about it.  The easier it is to talk about it, the easier the anointing flows to bless others. Every trial or test you have lived through can be part of you helping someone else.  I think of people who have lost loved ones to senseless violence.  I admire those who put on a new hat and decide to vindicate their loved ones by ensuring this does not happen to anyone else.  America’s Most Wanted was launched on the tail of a horrible crime.  People have built Hospitals and given scholarships after the loss of someone dear to them.   What is hurting you today? It might be as simple as a relationship that has ended in the midst of infidelity, or a person who wrongfully had you fired or even someone who has hurt someone close to you.  Regardless to the reason, forgiving is not impossible.  It is a choice.  A choice of the heart.
 

1 Corinthians 10:13

 No temptation has overtaken you except such is common to man; but God is faithful, who will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able, but with the temptations will also make a way of escape, that you may be able to bear it. 

 

I taught a message once called "A Typical Trial".  This message dealt with this scripture.  There is not anything in this world that you go through that someone else has not encountered.  The details may be different, but the issue much the same.  A Typical Trial.  The only thing that makes you stand out, is how you handle it.  You can choose to rise above the common responses and have a God response.  You can choose to forgive, to pray for the afflicters, and you can choose to allow incidents to build you instead of break you.  The choice is yours. 

 

 

TIPS TO HELP:

 

 

One of the best ways to help in forgiving someone, is to pray for them. 

It is hard to continue holding negative thoughts for those you genuinely pray for.  The prayer should not be “Lord, let them see the error of their wicked ways.  Teach them to be nicer to me and stop all their money from flowing until they get a clue.” 

God does not hear or answer that type of prayer!   Maybe try this:

A PRAYER TO HELP

 

 

Father God,

I thank You for     (the person(s) that hurt you) .  Thank You for caring about them as You care about me.  Lord, I know You have a plan for them, help them to walk in it.  Surround them with good people that will remind them of Your word and Your purpose for their life.  I come against the enemy that wants to divide them and cause them to miss You.  I choose to release them from any harm they have intended towards me.  I receive the good that You always release in the midst of bad.  I pray that they too will walk in Your grace and favor.  Allow them to know You in a way that would not have been possible before.  I love You and give You glory for caring about all of Your children, and for causing all things to work together for both of our good.  I trust You to care for them as You do me.  I thank You for hearing and answering our prayers, in Jesus name, amen.

Be encouraged knowing that this part of your life is in His hands.  Never give anyone else the ability to change your relationship with God.  Living in unforgiveness gives others power to limit what God can do in you, and what you can do for others.  So even if you don't FORGET IT..... FORGIVE IT! 

All Out War- FIGHT WITH LOVE!

This world is in a serious turmoil!  We just celebrated the 4^th of July with family, friends and fireworks.  Just a few days after that, all hell has broken loose. 

Headlines of two men killed by police officers has been the  focus for the past few days.  People emotions rising and communities on edge.  Most people who are responding to this news simply want to bring attention to a problem in our society.  We have heard from pastors, actors, every day people and YOU.  All of us have been engaged one way or another understanding there is a problem and we need to fix it.

So here we are 3 days after celebrating our freedom and now this.  An ambush in Dallas, Texas planned to kill and hurt our police officers and other citizens.  

NOTE:  If you are less angry about the attack in Dallas than you were about the two men who lost their lives,

YOU ARE PART OF THE PROBLEM.

A few things to know.

I tried.  I tried to sound civil and to simply bring some wisdom to a situation that can go out of control if we don’t focus on it.  I tried to write and encourage those who were out there to understand, Yes we need to do something about this.  But I realize now… this is a much bigger problem that is needing a MUCH BIGGER answer.  We are not going to fix this without GOD.   If you are not religious, get over it.  It is going to be God.  We are too vested in our lives and our cultures to completely understand others.  We have seen too much, we have heard too much and we have said too much to back up and find a civil resolution.  So part of my resolution today is lending my little blog to the ONE who knows everything.  The following note holds answers to anyone who will dare be serious about fixing this problem.

The Bible Blog

Love in Action

"Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good.    Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves.     Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord.     Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer.    Share with the Lord’s people who are in need. Practice hospitality.    Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse.     Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn.     Live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud, but be willing to associate with people of low position. Do not be conceited.    Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everyone.    If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.    Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,” says the Lord.    On the contrary: “If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.”    Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good." ~ GOD  ( Romans 12:9-21)

I love when God speaks. And He does... every day.   I am a teacher, so I think in terms of practical application.  So your Bible Blog  assignment this week, especially today is this:

• Pay attention to those around.  Those of every race, every gender, every persuasion
• Make eye contact and nod your head if you can’t speak, (not upward but a downward nod like a bow)
• Smile!  We can all use a friendly face today.

• Hold your head up and speak easily with those that are different from you

You may think this is silly, but we have to overcome this evil.  Don’t look at people as if you are waiting to see who will  win the stare down.  Take the initiative to let people around you know you are a solution carrier, not a problem.  You will need to engage with your neighbors, if you have NEVER SPOKEN TO THEM BEFORE… This is the week to begin. 

You may think this is too much, if you think you are not going to bow… then you are not serious about being part of the human race.  People you know are scared and unsure of things, our children will look at each other funny for a few days, take the initiative to take back what has been taken from us… Our sense of community. 

This is all out war….. Fight with LOVE!

---

Expect Respect? Police v/s Community

Those of you who know me, know I am not an activist.  I am not trying to be one, won’t be one after this.  But what I am is an African American citizen of the United States of America.  I am governed by laws that are written and some not written.  I respect authority and honor my president, no matter what party they are affiliated with and no matter what color they are.  I am patriotic, I do love this country.  I still hold my hand over my heart when I hear the Star Spangled Banner.   What I am not, is BLIND.

I wrote an earlier blog about Resisting Arrest. It speaks to the difficulty for anyone to NOT resist arrest.  It is not in our make-up. Our bodies automatically move when in pain, automatically respond when threatened.  My first blog was early in the day so I mentioned the shooting of Mr. Alton Sterling, but I chose to not comment on what I had not looked further into.   

Since then, I was able to view another angle of the shooting.  My heart sank and  I almost threw up.  I accidentally came across the video and before I knew it, I was watching a man die.  I watched his arm shake uncontrollably while the life left his body.  In the midst of the cursing from the officers and the removing of the gun from his shorts, I was unable to move.   

Last night I lost a lot of sleep due to talking to my children.  My 14 year old son was talking about the video, so I sat with him in my room and talked it out.  I could see him wiping tears, trying not to let me see him.  We had a discussion about why I do what I do when a teacher calls me from school or why I have him apologize on his own when a bus driver wrongfully accuses him of something.  The initial conversation from the school often seems escalated on their end, they were expecting me to defend, take off earrings and fight.  But, I allow them to see the rational and understanding side of our family.  This has served us well in school.  But what happens when he begins to drive, when he begins to look for a job and people don’t call me to complain about him.  Needless to say, we went to bed late.  I woke this morning and the light was still on in his room.  He slept with the light on.

Yes, I was tired.  But before sleeping I had the horror of watching yet another live feed of Mr. Philando Castile who was shot and killed by an officer after a traffic stop.  I don’t watch high level violent movies, so I am not calloused, this is not entertainment to me.  This became a rare occasion that I am seeing a second person die after being shot- this one on a live feed.

I have mentioned before that I was not an activist.  But I know that action is required.  At some point, we have to realize that there are problems in our society.  Many of us have known it, but others who have the power to do something about it, still live in denial.  I listened as one woman tried to use Mr. Sterling’s past as an excuse to be gunned down while pinned down.  I hear another person say that the officers were in fear for their lives.  I’m not sure they saw the same 2 videos that I saw.

So what are we going to do?  I encourage everyone to do what you can.  You may not do crowds or boycotting, but you may write, talk, send letters, call your congressman, mayor or other government officials.  Let them know, something has to be done to better unite our communities and our law enforcement. 

RESPECT GAINED- RESPECT LOST

POSITIONAL RESPECT

There are two ways to gain respect.  One way respect is gained is for the position, role or title you hold.  It is expected and given automatically.  You don’t have to earn it, people can respect you while you are in that position, but they might still disrespect you otherwise.  It is like working on a job for a boss you dislike, but because of their role and your paycheck, you put up with it.  The position of law enforcement has been given the same boot that our presidential role has been given.  Ever since President Bush was ridiculed as he left office, had shoes thrown at him, the office has been disrespected.  Now with President Obama, it has escalated.  NO respect for the POSITION. Our police have lost the respect as a position. This is unfortunate for those who do their jobs well and take their oath seriously.  It is much like any race or religion who are placed in the same pot and judged as a whole.

EARNED RESPECT

The second way to gain respect is to earn it.   This depends on what you do or what you have done.   Each day we have to earn respect on our jobs, in our neighborhoods and in our families.  How we act determines whether or not someone will give us any respect.  Now, our police are losing that too.  How can you enforce the law if there is no respect for authority?  What we are seeing right now is not good. We need to begin and continue a valid conversation in our communities and with our law enforcement.  We need training on both sides on how to handle a simple stop that is not viewed initially as criminal. We need training on how to deescalate situations instead of escalating them.   

We have a choice.  We can get angry for a moment then continue with life as it has been, or we can do something about it.  In our homes- give back authority to parents to discipline children without fear of prosecution, give back the right to be innocent until proven guilty, give back what we take from each other every day-  the right to live.

If we don't do something, all of us are subject to lose.  

If we can’t find a common ground of mutual respect with the community and law enforcement…there will be no enforcement of law.

RESISTING ARREST- You May Too!

I awoke this morning to the news of another man being gunned down and killed by the police.  My heart is heavy and saddened once again.  I found myself thinking:

“I wonder how they are going to explain this one.”  

Don’t get me wrong, I am not by any means against police.  My mother was a deputy sheriff in El Paso for many years.  She befriended many that she apprehended, they would come to our house and she would help them get their lives together.   I recall reading (without her knowing) reports of her having to apprehend offenders while transporting them to jail. Some freed themselves and had to be contained again in the van they were riding in.  I couldn’t imagine my mother doing that! Not only did I grow in concern for her safety, but I also grew in respect for what she did every day to provide for us as a single mother.  

I understand the daily concern for safety and not knowing what someone is thinking or planning when police approach someone.  But I also understand the same feelings today when being approached by the police or by anyone for that matter.  So when I said “I wonder how they are going to explain this one” It is a real question.  They will be called on to determine why a man on the ground pinned by two officers, was shot and killed. Why their cameras somehow fell off during the scuffle.  It was said there was a gun in the deceased man’s pocket, but not in his hand. 

I hope that all responsible people will take time to pray for everyone involved, for the family that just lost a loved one; for the process to determine what happened, and for the city that is on edge.

I am not going to talk much more about this incident, since it is in the beginning stages and more info will surface, but I will share something that has been in my mind for quite a while.

Resisting Arrest

Who knows HOW NOT TO DO THIS?  So many reasons have been given for excessive force being used because someone was resisting arrest.   When I hear that a person apprehended pulled back or pulled away, maybe they tried to lift their head or torso from the ground, they twisted their body when their arms were pinned behind their back.  Who knows HOW NOT TO DO THIS?

I will tell you who knows how to NOT resist arrest- the learned criminal.

Honestly, every day I hear about someone being beaten or shot because they resisted arrest, I have asked myself.  How do they know how not to resist? 

• It is in our makeup if we are pushed down, we pull up. 
• If someone aims for our head, we raise our arms to block.
• If something surprises us, we get in a Kung Fu stance.  (at least I do)
• If we are chased, surprised, or think danger-  we run or, we may advance. 

This is normal behavior for all humans- every race, every gender. 

The only ones who resist with ill intent are the learned  criminals.  The rest of us don’t really know how NOT to resist arrest.  We are not accustomed to having our hands pulled high behind our backs, we are not used to being told to get on the ground without asking questions.  And being forced on the ground with a knee in our back is not only uncomfortable, our bodies will not just relax and let it happen.

NOTE TO LAW ENFORCEMENT:

I wish that you would take note. Understand that the average person does not have a record. Some of us look like we do, but that is called profiling.  (I was told many times that I look like I can sing.)

We don’t respond instantly to someone telling us to get on the ground or chasing us- even if you have a uniform on.  (Nowadays, especially if you have one)

NOTE FOR THE REST OF US: I have heard many say, “They shouldn’t have resisted.” 

Don’t get it in your mind that it is automatically acceptable to shoot or beat someone who is said to be resisting arrest.  Unless we begin to think like a seasoned criminal, we may one day be roughed up for the same reason.  

Just something to think about.....

Please take time now to pray for the family of Mr. Alton Sterling, for those involved, and for Baton Rouge.