"Laughing Through Hurt."

Kids have energy, they also have the ability to wrestle, play and enjoy themselves. My kids used to wrestle with their father and it was fine, (as long as they kept me out of it) so wrestle they did.  It was fun to watch... until someone got hurt.   Having just one boy and three girls meant the girls knew how to hold their own, but they also knew when to stop.

I have watched children play and wrestle and it seems that they can recover rather quickly from painful experiences- only because they are playing.  One moment they are in deep tears, the next moment they burst out laughing.  Somehow the hurt that is intentional seems to hurt worse than the unintentional one that happens while playing.  Some feel that a hurt is a hurt, but not to children... and maybe not to adults either.

INTENTIONAL/UNINTENTIONAL HURTS

When we realize that someone has intentionally tried to hurt us, I believe it does something in our minds.  Other emotions can be triggered because it feels like there may be an underlying animosity or disrespect present.  If someone means you bad and you know it, you are more likely to use a defense mechanism to guard yourself from them. Your pain feels different in your mind and you don't want to feel that again because it hurts deeply.  If you believe the pain is unintentional, you may give them the benefit of the doubt.  You trust that what you think about the person is accurate.  You believe what they say, or what it looks like in your mind.   This is where we can get messed up and locked in abusive relationships.  The bible says in 1 Corinthians 13:7 that:

"Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things."  

This is true, Love does all of that, but if you realize this is not MUTUAL love, you need to stop believing people have your best interest at heart when they intentionally hurt you. You can continue to love people from a distance when you realize they do not love you the way God has ordained.  Scripture does not tell us to stay in abuse and allow ourselves to be hurt and broken trying to obey God. If we need breaking, God can break us without using abuse.  Knowing the difference is key... See the same chapter in 1 Corinthians says that:

"Love is patient, love is kind.  It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.  Love is not rude, it is not self seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no account of wrongs.  Love takes no pleasure in evil, but rejoices in the truth."  

  

One thing we have done is use scripture to keep ourselves in bondage instead of using it to live in the freedom it should bring. Whether you are male or female, continuing to allow someone to hurt you and use scripture to make you stay, is not love. 

KNOWING THE DIFFERENCE

In our society today we need to know the difference between intention and unintentional hurts.  All of us have experienced both.  There are people who love us who have done things to hurt us, it may cause a rift in the relationship, but we have forgiven them and gone on. Some of us have dealt with the pain and can continue to laugh and enjoy life- with or without them; and no hard feelings.  

Others have dealt with intentional pain and hurts and laughed too soon.  We have continued to allow people to hurt us and cause us to be less than who we are meant to be.   Again if we need patience, God knows how to teach it to us, if we need to be broken of bad habits, God is well able to teach us.  He does not use abusive situations that will change the core of who He is making us, and leave us hurt, mad, angry and unable to fulfill our purpose.. all at the hands of someone you trusted more than He ever would to mold your life. People should never have such a hold on you that you cannot break free.   If you are laughing too quickly after being hurt, don't ignore the pain- because it will continue.  Pain is an indication that something is wrong.

If you are in a situation where who you are becoming is focused away from God instead of towards him, away from Love and away from your Purpose....  back away.  Get help and choose to build yourselves up in God- surround yourself with people who mean you well and sharpen you.   That does not mean you will never be hurt again, it just means that people who genuinely LOVE you are not trying to hurt you intentionally.  

Life is meant to be enjoyed and sometimes things happen that are not fun, even when playing.  Learn to tell the difference between when a hurt is a result of not paying attention when playing, or when hurt has an underlying negative emotion connected to it.   There is a time to laugh and a time to play, there is also a time to stop laughing and playing, and deal with your hurt or the one hurting you.  Learn, to Love, Laugh and Live!

Enjoy today....