A Family Feud- Our Nation Divided

This is one part of three that will talk about our Nation and the divisions we experience. 

Disclaimer:  If we will ever understand why we have opposite sides that are so adamant about their stance, we will have to find common ground to look at it.  We are a family, so if you can for just a moment, let go of your own thoughts, your upbringing, your race, religion and gender.  Go with me on a simple journey called: A Family Feud.


THE FEUD BEGINS

 

JOHN works hard for his money, he had a chance to make more and his DAD helped him. Now he is making a lot of money and doing good.  His brother BRAD didn't get the same chance because DAD thought he was lazy, so he didn't give him the same opportunity.  Instead of encouraging BRAD to further his skill and investing in his education, DAD wants John to help support BRAD. This had angered JOHN, he does not think it is fair since it seems BRAD is now comfortable and seems content to just get help from him.

 

MISSED OPPORTUNITIES

Another brother MATT is skilled and working hard to make it, he refuses to take advantage of JOHN- although DAD told him he could.  Somehow when he works to get ahead, John blocks him as if he is asking for a handout.  But MATT is willing to do the hard work, he just needs a little help to get in the door, just like the help John got, but every time JOHN'S friends see him coming... he is refused.  This angers MATT, he is getting more and more resentful of JOHN, and DAD.  He is also angry at BRAD because he knows that it is his fault people feel the way they do about him.

 

MISSED COMPENSATION

In all of this we also find LEAH, she is the only daughter.  She has always had to work hard because DAD mainly pays attention to the boys.  She worked hard enough to prove  herself to be efficient, trustworthy and successful.  But somehow because there is more emphasis on the men, she tends to not be able to benefit as much from DAD because they think what she does is not the same as what the guys do. She is angry because she has great plans that she can't afford to invest in.  (NOTE: BRAD is not really doing much of anything, but even if he would try, he may surpass her... just because.)

  

PRIVELEDGE

The final family member is RACHEL.  She is BRAD's daughter.  Everyone feels sorry for her because she really has little chance of advancing but she desires to.  So DAD has allowed the colleges to consider her first so she can attend with discounts. They may even allow her a little loan to help her if she pursues a business, but the pay back is crazy!  The purpose is to stop her from becoming like her father, BRAD, but JOHN is getting more angry by the second and so is MATT, they are paying part of the bill and are not afforded similar opportunities for their own kids.  Yes, they have opportunities, but they work to support their kids.  JOHN is just tired of feeling like he is footing the bill for everyone.  Of course no one cares what he thinks because everyone knows that he is where he is because of the privilege DAD gave him that the others have not been given. 

 

 We are this family...  How do we fix this? 

 

Families are hard enough without special treatment for one or the other.  We see it every day, no one wants to know that their sibling is Dad's favorite or that one is not considered when plans are made.  This is the feeling I have when I think of America.  Regardless to how any of us got here, we are here now.  We either respond as humans to each other, or we will continue to have divisions among us.  Much like families, we are different.  We may not be able to live in the same household anymore, but we can at least acknowledge that we are related and we should believe and work for the best for each other.  That is what family does.

It takes a lot to change a family. In many cases it seems impossible because once we are grown, we have already lived our experiences and it has molded us.  But if we want to at least make it better,  it takes a commitment from every side.   It takes understanding that WE the children, are NOT the enemy, the system is. 

DAD is the system that has left every child where they are- against each other.  If we work together and make DAD see that what he is doing is dividing the family, maybe we can work together to do better. 

NOTE TO DAD'S

This not a reflection of your leadership as fathers! But how we parent and lead does determine how the kids feel about each other.  Thanks to all the wonderful DAD'S out there!  ~Jacqui